for me personally, i don't think i could ever successfully be in anything non-monogamous outside the occasional threesome. i'm too much of a possessive person for that. but more power to you! just because i don't think i could be in one (or even want to be), doesn't mean others shouldn't!

In my experience with other friends, it doesn't always work and tends to pull the relationship to pieces. But I do have one set of friends who are pulling off a pretty great poly relationship. With that, the two guys are just best of friends one is her actual husband and the other is her boyfriend. She's got two kids from previous relationships, and is still good friends with the dads, one kid with her husband (who also has a kid from a previous relationship), and her boyfriend has a kid from a previous relationship. They joke and say it's basically a commune at this point because there's 3 adults and 5 kids, not to mention her best friend married one of the dads so that's 2 more adults that are there any chance they can, and she has an on and off again girlfriend who is there at least a couple times a week, sometimes with her own teenage child.

But it works for them and they are SUPER happy. In fact the best friend is expecting her first kid and everyone is super excited. My opinion is that it wouldn't work for me, but if it works for you and everyone is happy, then who am I to judge. Go on and do you thing.

@aellotyphoeus: I have two children from a previous relationship whose father is not present in their lives. My kids call both of my boyfriends different variations of dad. They're young, but they understand enough to know that I have more than one partner and we all love them. We split parenting responsibilities pretty evenly as well.
@sulley: Like I said, not for everyone but poly relationships can be quite harmonious if everyone involved has mutual love and respect. Even we had a little bit of jealousy in the beginning. But we worked past it. I think regardless of how a relationship starts and who's in it, what matters is the love. Any type of relationship can last if you are fully committed to keeping it. And thank you. I love that the people I've met on this site are so open and accepting. Makes me feel like I can truly be honest and be myself. :)

@aellotyphoeus: Right?! If kids aren't taught to judge they really don't. They take people as they are and don't really see anything wrong with them. I wish more adults could be like that.

I always support people being in relationships that are based on mutual respect, trust, and honesty. Your poly relationship sounds like it has that included, so I have no problems with it! I could never personally be in a poly relationship but I don't have anything against those who are. I'm just too much of a possessive/jealous person so it wouldn't be good for me. xD

I'm forces to post using my phone at the moment so gonna keep this short but sweet lol. As Sam said, respect, trust, and honesty are what are important. As long as you have that, and happiness, then I am happy for you :) I support all sorts of relationships.
I could never personally be in a poly as I get jealous easily and am posssessive lol. But that's just me.

@pixiebuns: oh wow, it's cool to hear that someone else is poly. According to the internet it's becoming a trend, but I usually don't see evidence of it. :vanora_xd: if you guys would like a third, be open about that fact. That you are looking for someone who clicks with both of you, who you can both find attractive. That's all I can really suggest.
@aellotyphoeus: Agreed. I can't stand to see people raising their children with fucked up ideas, like racist or prejudice attitudes and parents who break their kid's spirit by condemning their interests and choices and forcing them to be someone else. It breaks my heart and I'm always in the middle of, not my kid not my problem and it is my problem because you're fucking up the next generation. :vanora_huff:

Everyone else, thanks so much for your support. I feel so loved here. :vanora_heart:

@pixiebuns: Yeah, I think it makes for much more fulfilling trustful relationships if executed the right way. I feel like giving up emotions like jealousy and possessiveness is very liberating. Me and my partners are all very close, I don't ever worry about cheating or them doing anything serious outside my knowledge. Usually they lie about little things, like breaking something, because they're little bitches who know I will get mad lol.
But, while polyamorous relationships are common amongst people our age, I've come to understand that older people have a lot of trouble grasping and accepting it. I can't count how many times I've been referred to as a polygamist or a swinger. :vanora_xd: I've also been called a whore, but for some reason that doesn't irritate me as much. :vanora_sweat:

@pixiebuns: Yeah I hear ya on the jokes. My friend literally said, and I quote: "Sometimes a girl love a boy, sometimes a boy loves a boy and sometimes two boys love one girl and sometimes those boys like to make that girl look like a toaster strudel, and that's ok!" lmfao :vanora_xd: most of my friends and even outsiders are pretty accepting or at least have an each their own attitude about it. There will always be assholes though, that's for sure.

I'm poly, personally, and my husband thinks he could make it work but when we tried it did not work out for us; we both grew pretty jealous at the thought of someone else being with the other. I don't know if it would work now that we're older, more mature, and have been together for a much longer time but I think we're happy to just be with each other. We have our own challenges just in our relationship alone; I don't think it'd be wise to add anyone else into the mix. Although sometimes I do kind of wish we could find a girl that we could both be into. I think it'd be nice for him to have someone who is more sexually active like he is because I am asexual so I almost never feel up for sex. And it'd be nice for me to be with a female someone who has more of those soft skills that my husband can sometimes lack. I think maybe what failed us the first time is we were seeing people separately. Maybe being with someone who would want to be with both of us would curb the jealousy because then we're all loving each other. But we're also planning to start a family in the next few years, which may include trying to get custody of his daughter and I don't know how that will affect things.

At the very least, polyamorous relationships are complicated to explain to others and just as complicated to be in yourself, and they aren't for everyone. But most of the people I know of who are in them are incredibly happy and that gives me hope that I can be too with the right people. At the very least I'm glad to see other people making it work and finding people who make them happy and understand them.