as i get older and as my depression worsens and life gets staler and i become emptier,
i notice that ive grown away from everyone. there is nobody in my life who has been there from the start
mom gone, dad doesnt like me. all my childhood friends left after i moved away
even the friends i make now go away eventually. they all do.
until there is nobody left.
there is only depression.
without it i would be..nothing? it's the only thing who has been there for me and who i know always will be
as i speak to my sister she tells me "you havent been in my life for the past 3 years. you moved away. of course i forgot about you"
we dont have the same relationship. i am growing up into new interests and creating more distance. we share less in common these days
i share less in common with everyone, it seems. as i fall deeper i realize im reaching isolation and seclusion
is this what i wanted?
have i grown up, or have i gone away? or..both...have i grown away?
Forums Serious Talk growing up or going away?
Time to move away from your past from your now. Time to get healthy and Start a new life a new future
~Pls Ping me~
Nothing fancy to see here!!!
Nothing fancy to see here!!!
I felt those feels a lot when I was on my way to "growing up". Mind you, nothing clicked for me until I was nearing 30. On the road there, my closest sibling went off to college and pretty much forgot I existed... the rest of my close family was wrecked by the person usually holding it together. I had one close friend who I am now not close to at all because we are too different of people. It was just a transitional phase, and I'm sure thats what it is for you as well. Right now I have three people I'm family-level close to, and two people I trust as friends. Its not a lot, but the quality is so much better than the quantity.
The depression makes it hard, for sure. Just know that the people who are scared to support you through the depression are not worth keeping in your life anyway. I personally had to practice looking at things on the bright side. It sounds stupid when you're in that headspace, but I just kept replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. I forced it until it was natural. I still get depressed at random, over pointless things more often than not, but it no longer rules my life.
I guess my biggest advice is not to isolate (well, at least when thats a health-wise option again). Talking to people online counts just as much as going outside and socializing with people face to face. Just talk to folks, about anything. It makes such a big difference to connect when you feel like you can't. You might find a lot of people you can't connect with, but the one or two people you can connect with more than make up for it.
The depression makes it hard, for sure. Just know that the people who are scared to support you through the depression are not worth keeping in your life anyway. I personally had to practice looking at things on the bright side. It sounds stupid when you're in that headspace, but I just kept replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. I forced it until it was natural. I still get depressed at random, over pointless things more often than not, but it no longer rules my life.
I guess my biggest advice is not to isolate (well, at least when thats a health-wise option again). Talking to people online counts just as much as going outside and socializing with people face to face. Just talk to folks, about anything. It makes such a big difference to connect when you feel like you can't. You might find a lot of people you can't connect with, but the one or two people you can connect with more than make up for it.
You know I'm always up for a talk whenever you need one. Growing up is different for everyone and people sometimes just drift apart. It's sad, but can't always be avoided. Like Glume said, quality over quantity. I don't have a lot of people I'm close to, but the ones I am, I hold very dear.
Lucifer's Pet
I think that is part of life. Growing away happens to us all as we age and have life experiences. Some make families, start a new career, move away, travel. Life continues and never stops. And so it is your chance to begin the journey that calls to your soul. Everywhere you go you meet new people. People come and go. But your life you must live it and fill it up with experiences you want to have or call to you.
°<°art by Keturah🖤🦖🖤
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Having you as a Voltie would be awesome.