Just a little rant, but does anybody else feel like this?

Purpsy

Friend PM Trade

★彡 I always have this fear that I might hurt someone's by saying something wrong unintentionally or might give a bad impression to someone during my conversations in general. I do try to keep in mind that everyone's perspective is different and the things I say may have not been a big of a deal at all and if it does, I'll just listen to their side then apologize if needed to. Even so there are times I just get annoyed for feeling this way and it would be nice to just enjoy talking to someone without worrying such things. Which there are times I do but I guess it doesn't happen too often?

I think there are also the fact that I don't socialize too often and there's some past trauma that I come to realized when I had been gaslighted quite a number of times before. So when I feel especially strong like this I just don't want to socialize at all for a period of time. But it made me realize that my image matters more than I originally thought. 彡★

Alorrena

Friend PM Trade

I used to feel like that. I stopped because i realized that stressing over other people's feelings is just something that i shouldn't do. Other people's feelings and emotions are not your responsibility when you are not intentionally being hurtful or rude. You're doing things right by listening to their opinions and apologizing if necessary. I'm sure an explanation as to your side of things helps too, if you feel it needed, but i don't think you should feel obligated to explain yourself when it wasn't something intentional or hurtful, either.

Honestly, intentions matter a lot. unfortunately, not everyone will know your intentions. but that's okay. it's not on you to make everyone happy. just yourself.

Call me Rena (Reh-nuh)! <3 married 02/02/2020
Rena's Quest

Wildfire

Friend PM Trade

Everyone's perspectives are different, and everyone's level of sensitivity to different situations and stimuli is different too - and it varies daily, hourly, monthly- ... but there is no way you can truly know these things about other people when you interact with them, and there's little you can do about it even if you could tell. The same thing goes for the impressions you leave with other people... it's not in your control, and it's often more a reflection of them than it is of you.

However, it's human nature to want to feel liked, appreciated, etc. and we all make some "adjustments" when we interact with others to ensure a certain level of this happening (at least that's the case in most typical "socially polite" situations). I don't think most people are out to upset others or are willfully abrasive or insensitive... nor are most people usually out to be aggressive, mean or angry. Basically, as long as you hold some sense of decency, a little awareness of the person and situation, and you have at least a basic level of respect for the person(s) you're interacting with, you should be good.

Have a little more faith in yourself - you know you're not out to hurt people with an unintentionally misspoken word... but even if it does happen, you are not responsible for how other people react or interpret things- that's on them. And if there is some kind of misunderstanding, all you can do is try to talk through it...

┤▒├ Hangout with me! ┤▒├

GoblinsAndTea

Friend PM Trade

(˵◕ ᴥ ◕˵)ﾉ Hello there

I have this everytime no matter if the conversation is good or bad. However im authistic, i tend to be blund with things and end up being misunderstood. It lead to me over explaining everything.
It can be very frustrating at times

。.:☆*:･ヽ(˵◕ ᴥ ◕˵)

♦ My Art Shop ♦

blue

Friend PM Trade

I think there's a meme around somewhere that makes light of this feeling. I think the last line is that, when walking away from a conversation you just had, you would think 'that wasn't my best work.'

It happens, but as it has been mentioned, you can only really be mindful of the things you're doing intentionally. A lot of it comes with age, but practice also helps build confidence. I had a philosophy that if I said something mean about a person, I had to be able to say it to their face and accept whatever consequences come my way. I didn't go out of my way to be mean, but we've all been in a situation where you just wanted to tell the other person they were being an asshole--whether or not it's appropriate to do so is up to your judgment and your backbone.

Purpsy

Friend PM Trade

★彡 @blue: Yep I definitely had those moments. As much I want to be caring to everyone they were moments that I don't. I keep repeating it in my head that not everyone deserves my kindness but at the same time I don't want to be a downright asshole back. I speak my truth and often I've been called out for being cold for it but at that point... I just don't give a damn anymore.

@GoblinsAndTea: I would love to have that little bit of bluntness sometimes. I cared too match what others think of me when I expressed my opinions sometimes that I get annoyed at myself for it.

@Wildfire: Thanks, this is something I am working on.
"you are not responsible for how other people react or interpret things- that's on them."
That line is something that I need to drill on my head because I am living with someone who are very reactive like that and constantly been told off I'm in the wrong... at this point there are times I don't understand if I'm in the wrong or not. Sigh chaotic family issues... 彡★

Art Dump ☆ Avatar Gallery ☆ Quest Items

blue

Friend PM Trade

I mean, it takes a little practice to balance and find your own voice in social situations. We can all pick out pretty quickly who is a prick under the guise of being "honest" (the most cringeworthy) or "edgy," (just eyeroll worthy).

Feral

Friend PM Trade

god, yeah.

it's a pain in the ass bc i end up overexplaining shit in order to clarify intention, then people end up getting mad anyways.

please ping me for the love of god.

Forums Serious Talk Just a little rant, but does anybody else feel like this?

Purpsy

Alorrena

Wildfire

GoblinsAndTea

blue

Purpsy

blue

Feral

You must be logged in to post