★⌒☆⌒★⌒☆⌒★
2020 has been such a wild ride... January, my partner of 6 years and I broke up. After that I was staying at my grandmothers for a month while I found an apartment on short notice. Then there was me being in my first year of full-time professional teaching and just doing gosh awful with deadlines and not reaching out to others (my co-workers) when I needed them the most...
A lot of these losses are due to the fact that... I don’t know how to speak up for myself... I try and try and try to do everything on my own first when in actuality... I would be SO MUCH MORE successful if I accepted help at step 1 instead of scrambling to accept help as step 10...
I’m definitely learning from my mistakes... and this past weekend was an even bigger wake-up call. Went to see some family members at a cabin my grandmother was renting. My stepmom and dad were there. My stepmom is my role model, she is who I aspire to be... She is strong, amazing at balancing her workload, cares for her family, has a nice friend circle, follows her dreams even if they are years away...
My stepmom told me “You know something, how are you going to be a good teacher if you cannot help yourself? How are you going to effectively help your students if you are in shambles?” And to some this may sound very rude, but this is how she is. My stepmom has been in my life since I was around 9/10 and I am 24 now. She is blunt and tells the harsh truth to make people see what they really need to see.
Reality hits hard... and slowly throughout this week I have been planning out how to effectively go forward. It is a struggle... I have no motivation and my mental state continues to decline with incredibly small peeks about one time a day for a short period of time...
I just gotta look in the mirror and take the words others tell me to heart. I gotta grab myself and tell myself I am worth it. I gotta face the situations I do not want to face and let my voice be heard... Because if I don’t... what is the point?
A lot of these losses are due to the fact that... I don’t know how to speak up for myself... I try and try and try to do everything on my own first when in actuality... I would be SO MUCH MORE successful if I accepted help at step 1 instead of scrambling to accept help as step 10...
I’m definitely learning from my mistakes... and this past weekend was an even bigger wake-up call. Went to see some family members at a cabin my grandmother was renting. My stepmom and dad were there. My stepmom is my role model, she is who I aspire to be... She is strong, amazing at balancing her workload, cares for her family, has a nice friend circle, follows her dreams even if they are years away...
My stepmom told me “You know something, how are you going to be a good teacher if you cannot help yourself? How are you going to effectively help your students if you are in shambles?” And to some this may sound very rude, but this is how she is. My stepmom has been in my life since I was around 9/10 and I am 24 now. She is blunt and tells the harsh truth to make people see what they really need to see.
Reality hits hard... and slowly throughout this week I have been planning out how to effectively go forward. It is a struggle... I have no motivation and my mental state continues to decline with incredibly small peeks about one time a day for a short period of time...
I just gotta look in the mirror and take the words others tell me to heart. I gotta grab myself and tell myself I am worth it. I gotta face the situations I do not want to face and let my voice be heard... Because if I don’t... what is the point?
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🌈 Let the sun shine on your face,
