Already a Voltie? Sign in!

Escape to Voltra!

Join for free

Forums The Undercurrent Synth’s journal

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/2 23:35:04 )
And like
I know it’s real in some capacity.

My time with Alicia proved that.

I wish I had another mentor to help me make sense of things
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/2 23:36:08 )
Last night the Looker looked like a Pokémon. Like a glamour of pikachu. To make me let down my guard. And I think it worked.

If that was a test I failed. But I think it was just training. Unsure.

There’s really no teacher. Do I need to become lucid?
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/2 23:36:37 )
I know I sound bats hit and I don’t care
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/2 23:59:04 )
Maybe I should try to find an online community for this kind of thing

Or I should at least reconnect with my daily practice. I haven’t touched my cards since we moved except the once.

Maybe an old school blog about it.

And yeah I think paper is right out. I’m wishing I could pull up my reading from last year but I don’t know where the fuck I saved it
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/2 23:59:25 )
And if I had a blog and I joined a forum I could kinda connect with others on it
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/2 23:59:51 )
I dunno. Last year when things were looking so dark I had a crisis of faith for the first time. And I don’t know that I’ve recovered. And that hurts.
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:00:23 )
I have a desire for concrete knowledge, not faith. But I guess that’s not how that works.
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:00:46 )
I mean. I know what I know.

And I know what I don’t.
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:01:00 )
My Capricorn veneer is getting in the way of my Aquarius heart
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:04:02 )
I put mean words in people’s mouth before they even say them
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:04:28 )
I take a measure of someone, decide their capacity to hurt me, and react as if they’ve already done it. I think that’s thanks fo the shade. Need to chill with that.
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:05:08 )
I believe in shades. I believe in light.

I believe in the cycle. I believe in my higher being.
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:05:50 )
Honestly I’ve stopped calling him Ed because he’s just me, I’ve recently learned. Still kinda call them “e dreams” which is fitting. It is ecstasy, that power. What little power it is.
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:06:38 )
I wish I knew how to use it in this life though. I feel relatively powerless here. Though that’s not true.

I need to reconnect with my roots and study the culture and paganism of my ancestors. That might lead me somewhere. Works for baby bear.
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:07:04 )
Doesn’t matter any way. The pantheons are all just reflections of the same light
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 00:07:16 )
Y’all mind if I scream
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 01:00:43 )
What the fuck google come on
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 01:02:27 )
Bos software:
Docuwiki
Blogs
Notion
Hot glue
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 01:08:32 )
Tumble would be an option for a private set up but do I really want that
Report

Donator Posted 3 years ago ( 2022/04/3 01:09:16 )
Sounds like whatever I do I should back it up on GitHub
Report
ping me for best results

You must be logged in to post

Login now to reply
Don't have an account? Sign up for free!
Having you as a Voltie would be awesome.