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Forums Serious Talk Potential electrical issues that may just be my mother in law.

Donator — Am Potato Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/11 15:08:27 )
So Last week my husband and i moved into his mom's house. We're paying rent and our share of the bills. So, it's more of a roommate situation for us.

So it's important to note that last week we had laptops, this week we got PCs. Everything is on the same power strip. Since we got the PCs, it seems like a nightly thing where our power strip is turned off at some point while we are asleep. We were thinking that it was the dog accidentally stepping on the power button, but now we're thinking it might not be. When we went to bed last night, we put a suitcase and my computer chair in front of our doorway to block the dog from coming into the room ( we don't have a door). So when we woke up, we were surprised to find that the power wasn't working in our room at all. So i told my husband to check the circuit breaker because it may have tripped. He went to the garage and flipped it back on and came back and told me that it looked like it had been flipped because it wasn't in the half way position it normally goes to when the breakers get tripped and was instead fully into the off position. So now we're wondering if his mom flipped the breaker off because she couldn't get in the room to turn off our power strip. This is upsetting because of the new PCs. We put them in sleep mode, or if Tyi is doing updates, he locks his computer and turns off his monitor.

We think it's her because his mom is a stickler about the electric usage, even though we'll be paying the difference we make. She doesn't like the house being below 76 when she's at work, or below 78 when she's home at night, and is always talking about the electric bill.
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Donator — She/her Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/11 15:54:41 )


@Alorrena: You could show her the math. What the rate is for the energy at that time of day and show how much power computers in sleep mode do. And then once you show her it's probably $1 a month or something like that, she will lay off. It's more important about what you keep the AC at, or using the dishwasher when it's not full, or doing laundry when it's not a full load.

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Donator — Am Potato Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/11 16:09:08 )
@Totalanimefan: She admitted to flipping the breaker and turning off the power strip. I'm just mad that she didn't just talk to us like adults. I mean, i turn 30 on sunday, i think she can talk to me like an adult. Apparently, she did it because she wants to "make sure we can pay" the electric bills. I mean, i get that her other kids had issues in the past and that the bill is in her name. Fine, no biggie, But don't automatically expect me to be like your other kids. I married her "good" kid. He was the responsible one and didn't get into trouble like her other 3 kids. So i don't get why she'd treat us like that. Also, i'm perturbed by the fact that she was coming in our room and touching our things while we were asleep. i'm sorry, i sleep in my under clothes, so it's extra awkward for me because she's coming in our room while we're sleeping. Like, i'm not her kid. i'm not comfortable around her like that. It causes me so much anxiety. this whole thing makes me understand why my husband has trust issues.

We respect her wishes and keep the AC at 76 when she's not home, we keep it at 78 when she is home, and we haven't done laundry yet, and we don't use the dishwasher. We really only have out PCs running and using electricity, and then we have a small fan on and the ceiling fan on (cause it's too hot without them!)
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Donator — She/her Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/11 17:00:13 )


@Alorrena: You could say to her, I don't feel comfortable with anyone coming into my room while I sleep, it really puts my body on edge, or something like that. Because really, that's not cool and not allowed.
Maybe say something like, I would like for us to be able to communicate instead of just assuming what the other wants. I think that would help us.
Ceiling fans cost like cents to run. There is no point in turning it off unless you aren't in the room, they don't cool down the room, they just cool off pets and humans.


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Donator — Am Potato Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/11 18:40:51 )
@Totalanimefan: Yeah, there's really not a whole lot of electronics going in our room. I'm just letting my husband deal with his mom, because it's his mom, and i shouldn't have to, nor would i feel comfortable doing so.
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Donator — She/her Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/11 19:50:47 )


@Alorrena: This is true. Maybe get him to say those things, but you should be able to talk to her about things too. You both are adults.

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Donator — Am Potato Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/12 01:37:38 )
@Totalanimefan: I feel more that i'm just not very good with confrontation and i often say things the wrong way. He's going to talk to her about coming in our room when we're asleep when she gets home tonight.
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Donator — She/her Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/12 03:26:30 )


@Alorrena: good that he is going to talk to her.

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Donator — Am Potato Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/12 03:30:13 )
@Totalanimefan: She just got home, she didn't really say much but she apologized for her actions and not talking to us first. we will see if anything changes, or if she keeps doing things we don't approve of like treating us like kids, or like her other kids.

I hate when people do that- when they treat me one way because someone else slighted them or did something that upset them. Like, Damn, i'm my own person, i'm not them. At least give me a chance to mess up before you treat me like that, or give me a chance to prove to you that i'm not like the other people/person and i won't do what they did.
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Donator — She/her Posted 1 week ago ( 2022/05/12 04:13:32 )


@Alorrena: yeah I know exactly what you mean. Happened to me before too.
Hopefully she will think about it. Maybe she didn’t know how to react at first.


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