Umbermouse's posts

@Gatorlec:
@Count Trashula:

I just wanted to thank you both as your replies were the kind of detailed insight I was specifically seeking out. There's a lot to digest and consider here and I very much appreciate the time taken out of your day to help me with this.

I had a fear, and likely still do, of the deep end of a pool if it's mostly opaque. I can swim and dive, but there's something unnerving about the water. I'm like, "who knows what unknown terrors lie in the depths of the 8 foot midnight blue abyss"
Also I found one of those drawing journals I had for elementary school and was apparently terrified of snowmen. I wrote about them often and to this day I don't know why.

Ice skating scares me a bit. I stick to the walls. Don't have the same fear for roller blading though.
I wish I knew how to speak fluent Japanese a.k.a nihongo. And be able to read kanji in context along hiragana characters. The kana is easy, but kanji is no joke.
I also wish I knew how to develop flash or rpgmaker games.

@Bioshock: I'm impressed, because you're right on about all of it. For the most part they are just flings, though there is some bitterness and dissociation for a couple of days after a breakup. I'm not sure why they don't build lasting relationships with these other individuals or if there's even a will to build after miscommunication errors or mild arguments. I seem to be the exception however, though I can't fathom why that may be. I don't want to break up with my partner, cause I'd rather find a solution for my insecurities that'll be beneficial for us in the longrun. As a monogamous person, I'm not sure if polyamory is even something I could fully comprehend. All I know is I want my partner to be happy and unrestricted. And you're right, I should be more open with how I'm feeling about everything.

@TomYum: i'm wanting a dedicated relationship. We're both in our prime, my partner and I, so I don't want to hold them back or tie them down so early in our lives. I feel like I've found someone I can be myself around and grow something with, but it's these uneasy gut feelings that have been getting to me.

So as the title mentions I'm needing an outer perspective on things.
I'm currently dating someone who is polyamorous. I was told this would be the case prior to dating and I was fine with it cause at the time I hadn't had much dating experience. Over the past 6 months I've realized that they'd dated at least 7 other people while we were together (all online and I'm the only one in person). Most of the people they date all kind of know eachother. It's like a large group of poly people who casually date and break up on a whim. Honestly I'm not even sure how many people my partner is currently dating at the moment. I've also noticed that each time they're in a new relationship, even after just a day, their facebook has tagged posts talking about how great this new person is, maybe even "the best person ever", every single time. They even started dating someone new on my birthday. One of my irl friends I confided in has said that my partner isn't doing the poly thing right, but tbh I'm new to the whole thing. I'm monogamous, and feeling slight jealousy each time I find out about someone new. I'm not sure how to feel, so I sought out a new forum to ask (since recolor and gaia aren't too great for me anymore) Any insight is appreciated.