Donator
Posted 7 years ago ( 2018/02/13 22:47:29 )
Yeah, my family was more the "depression is a made up ailment that people claim they have so they can get doped up on drugs" type. So I have never felt like I could even have a theoretical discussion about depression with any of them without them getting all judgemental. But I had been cutting off and on, like when I was really bad and just wanted to be able to feel something, anything I would cut. Sort of. Actually, I would take a pin or thumbtack and just scratch myself over and over until it would bleed because I figured it probably physically hurt more than just cutting with a blade would. And then I would pick the scabs over and over until it would scar. Most of them have faded enough to barely be visible except for my "sucide" cuts that I did down my forearms. But I have not been that bad since around 2010. Part of which was finding a few really good friends and partly now I have cats who, while they don't prevent my issues, they give me the love and affection and just generally give me a reason to get up each day. And because I have not been that bad, I am at least partially covering my scars with tattoos, just symbols really, but they hold meaning. I have the one on my right done, but the one on my left probably won't be done until possibly this spring/summer or maybe next year depending on a few factors.
Ah, but now I'm rambling.
tl;dr: Family can really suck, but I'm better than I used to be and have furry support babies that I am eternally thankful that I have.