When ryker didnt return he sighed. Was he just...too grown up now?

He was exhausted and wanted to sleep but, something was nagging at him. Maybe a drink of water would destress him.

He felt something he hadnt in a long time. A stab of pain in his chest.

"No...dont give out on me yet..." he grimaced and he got up to the sink. He filled the cup and took a small drink. He went to take another drink but he heard the cup fall.

The next thing he knew he was on the floor barely consious, his heart struggling to cope with the stress he put on himself.

He couldnt really say anything. His heart pounded slowly.

"Hospital.." he manage to get out. he hated them but he knew he needed one.

He lifted his hand and held onto ryker, struggling to stay awake.

"S..sorry..." was all he could say before he passed out.

Thankfully no surgery this time. The nurrses and doctors were more familiar with dragon patients as they were right on the edge of dragon country.

However, eke's heart had almost given out from stress, so he was being monitored closely. Instead of the oxygen tube in his nose, he had the mask. His ekg monitor was slightly erratic for some time.

It wasnt till around dawn when it straightened out. A doctor had approached ryker.

"I would suggest the boy getting an implatable cardioverter defibrillator, or ICD. Itll help regulate his heart rate and prevent sudden cardiac death for a little longer than without one. Ive heard of his disease, and frankly, his heart will give out at some point, but an ICD might help him live a little longer. However, it is his decision, but i strongly suggest him getting one. His body is quite strong and chances of him surviving surgery is quite high." The doctor seemed to honestly want to help.

"Well, its completly up to the boy wether or not to do it so theres no time limit really. But if he doesnt get it, hes going to be unable to much of anything on his own in a few months i would say. And if he chooses to have it done, his surgery would be about 3 to four days after signing the papers" the doctor nodded and then smiled.

"He's doing alright for now. Its just a suggestion" he pat rykers shoulder and then walked out.

It was several hours after that before eke even woke up. He opened his eyes slowly, and only halfway. He looked at the ceiling for a moment before making any sounds. His chest hurt. He was pretty sore and stiff.

He slowly sat up feeling groggy. He took the mask off so he could speak.

He didnt look at ryker but he knew he was there. "If your going to say something...say it..."

Eke didnt sound himself.

He sounded...defeated. He sounded empty, ashamed.

He hadnt looked at ryker then entire time. Did he want it? or was he just ready to give up.

"What...do you want?" he looked looked at ryker. his golden eyes a little dull.

it was obvious he was bothered by quite a bit. He was unsure of who he was now.

He remembered his dream now. all of his fears suffocating him. Everything hed been through. And now, he didnt know if it was all worth it anymore.

He looked at his reflection. He really didnt like what he saw. A failure. a burden. A nobody...waiting to die.

He threw the mirror in a fit of uncharacteristic anger and self loathing.

"But its all pointless isnt it? What have i amounted to so far? what have i done with my life but run away from everything. Why do i even deserve to...to exist?" hot tears rolled down his cheeks.

"I dont know what i want anymore...i dont even kknow WHO i want to be anymore..."

He looked over at Ryker. He was right.

All he could do was cry. He grabbed ryker and pulled him close.

He sobbed into rykers shoulder. He needed this.

"Then why do i feel like such a failure? Why do i feel like i dont deserve those answers?" he held on tight.

He onlyy pulled away when he couldnt catch his breath. He put the mask back on and leaned back holding his chest.

"I still dont know why i should keep going...but...i...made a rpomise to myself 3 years ago...i promised myself that i wouldnt leave you alone if i could help it...i can help it this time..."

He nodded. "Im going to do it...i wont leave you alone. ill be damned if i let you go back to trying to off yourself"

he offered a weak but genuine smile, a little sparkle back into his eyes.

"Im..still pretty tired so..im going to rest. you can talkt to the doctor for me.." he winced and yawned.

"And ryker? i..." he looked away flustered. "I love you brother..."

He smirked. "I AM your family."

With that he settled and closed his eyes. soon after he was resting peacefully. he looked relaxed for once.

The doctor came back in to check his charts then turned to Ryker.

The doctor had no way of knowing eke had woken up or made a decision so he asked a...sensitive question.

"If...the boy crashes...do you want to sign a DNR?" he stared at ryker.