Shadami's posts

Posted in Professor Shadami's Pokestop Posted 5 years ago

Yeah. To bad it's not luckier for me xD

Posted in Professor Shadami's Pokestop Posted 5 years ago

Uhhhhhhhhh 5ish years? Roughly

Posted in Anxiety Attack Posted 5 years ago

@Priestess of Pie: I really wish my insurance covered the ability to do that.:/

Thank you though<3

@Tsundererra: I' am just an idiot kid everything though it am almost 30. Sigh frustration. But thsnk you

Posted in Anxiety Attack Posted 5 years ago

@vengeance: thanks <3 I just wish more people saw it that way

@Kozi: I appreciate that. I mostly just needed to vent because it randomly coming up in my thoughts was what was causing my panic attack. I really don't want to get ridiculed again and told off by doctors when I try so hard and nothing comes off it

Posted in Anxiety Attack Posted 5 years ago

Honestly I'm having a bit of an anxiety attack right now and need to talk to someone even though there is no guarantee someone will see this specific thread and respond. . .

Basically I was pregnant last year as many of you I talk to on a regularish basis know. Some of you know it was a really hard pregnancy and I struggled.
But again... Me being tough and having to put up with other people's shit all my life messed with me.
With my oldest daughter I taught her from birth everything I could. I didn't treat her like an idiot. I did all the right things to help Autistic children cope... Without realizing it.
But I knew something was off but the doctor that tested her told me I was an idiot and my daughter was just strong willed. 7 years later she is finally diagnosed with SCD, ADHD and dyslexia....I was right. But she was no longer getting the help she needed because she was written off as "just strong willed"
Now it happened again in my third pregnancy. I told the doctors over and over and over.
Something's wrong. Something's not right. I'm not myself. I feel like I'm going to die. Something's wrong. I'm gonna lose the baby.
They tested me over and over and assured me I was an idiot and that I was fine.

Nope.

I had preeclampsia but I was passing all the normal tests for it.
My baby and I both almost died.

Now months later I'm having a panic attack because what if there is other things wrong with me and I will never be diagnosed because doctors are to stupidly stuck on there ways that they can't see that everyone is different.

They told me the weight gain was me eating to much. I practically starved myself and still gained 50 pounds.
Fuck them.