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Posted in Tell me an interesting fact about yourself Posted 4 years ago
@Genuine Fake: It supposedly is manageable by medication but I chose not to. I enjoy my narcolepsy, but I'm lucky that my symptoms aren't scary or overwhelming to me. I've got the normal fall asleep at unusual times thing. This comes with cataplexy, which means sometimes my muscles stop functioning and parts of me, usually just eyelids and neck, but sometimes my hands or legs, go limp. Quite often as a child, I used to get sleep paralysis, and see the shadow people that commonly go with it. I hallucinate, but usually nothing scary, and it doesn't take me too long to figure out if its real. I always lucid dream, which is my favorite part.
Here's a weird thing to try to explain, lol: I used to have a persistent dream world, I could map it out if I took the time... but when I was pregnant, that changed. All my dreams suddenly took place in my childhood home. Once I had my baby, that changed again... I actually had a dream where my brain was looking for a "new dimension" to settle in. For the past two weeks since I had my baby, I've been in a much more "cinematic" realm, all my dreams are now like movies, and the cast of said dreams are secretly mutants or monsters. I have no idea what this says about my mental well-being XD
Posted in Tell me an interesting fact about yourself Posted 4 years ago
Probably everyone else here knows this and is sick of hearing it lol... but I'm narcoleptic! I also just had a baby, so my sleep schedule is whack.
Posted in I'm super socially awkward Posted 4 years ago
Being awkward is the first step towards making others feel awkward, and that's it's own special kind of magic.
Posted in I'm a mom now. Posted 4 years ago
Thanks everyone!

@Miss Sandman: my emotional state comes and goes. Right now it's 3am and we've been cluster feeding and poopy diapering since about 11 last night. She was at risk for jaundice so I'm currently super happy about all of that but also way too tired. I know I'll spend a lot if the day crying over various things. My poor husband can't sleep either so we're both going to have just an awful day im sure
Posted in I'm a mom now. Posted 4 years ago
Its pretty surreal, to be honest. It was quite an adventure getting my baby here. I was going to type up how it all happened but I'm getting rather emotional thinking about it, so I might save that story for later. I was in the hospital for a week, so a lot happened.
My daughter is beautiful, I've never been so proud of anything I've created. She had a few mild health problems but she's home and safe now. I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed in all directions, but my husband and I are slowly figuring out a new normal. I miss my normal-for-narcolepsy sleep schedule... I feel like I could get a better handle on my emotions if I could get proper sleep... but that will come later. For now, I just need to concentrate on keeping this little bean happy and well fed.
Posted in Sid Meiers Civilisation VI | FREE Posted 5 years ago
Epic games has given me some truly top-tier games. Not only do they give you a free game once a week, sometimes they'll decide to give two. For the winter holidays they released a new free game every day. Idk how they can afford to be so generous, but it has definitely swayed me from being a Steam-only gal.

That being said, I'm having a hard time getting into Civilizations simply because the tutorial DRAGS. Its the most slow paced hand holding thing, but I genuinely have no idea how to just jump in and play because there are so many options and paths. I want to like it, it looks fun


Posted in I'm having my baby Monday! Posted 5 years ago
@vengeance: Thank you! I'm trying so hard to avoid epidural or anything dramatic. We'll see how it goes... usually "it" goes "not as planned" for me lol
Posted in I'm having my baby Monday! Posted 5 years ago
Well, it might not be until Tuesday or later, but I'm going to start my induction on Monday. So I might be on hiatus for a while, OR I might be posting even more for venting/advice/posting adorable pictures nobody really wants to see. Only time will tell. I'm nervous and don't feel at all ready even though we are prepared. This is going to be a whole thing :spark-celebrate:
Posted in I haven't been chatting here lately Posted 5 years ago
@vengeance: Even your mildest chatting is more than what I get up to XD
I low-key hate this, because I now realize a lot of the stupid stuff I believed as a child was a result of adults lying to me. I'm super resolved to not lie to my child, or if I do, I'll let her know right away that I'm just joking.

My great grandmother told me that eating uncooked noodles made them turn into worms in your stomach, and eating seeds would make them grow inside you. I believed in Santa way too long because when I was a pre-teenager I got sat down and told we were not going to have Christmas presents due to being broke (which I totally was prepared to accept, btw), only to see (my extended family pitched in and bought) a TON of presents, all marked Santa. It was cute until I went to school and told all me friends how I knew he was real, and they proceeded to make way too much fun of me about it. I'm sure there are more horrible lies I believed, but I wont get into that right now :p

This is a more fun one, I guess, because its not based on lies: I was and still am afraid of large mirrors. It used to be that I thought they had the potential to be some sort of magical portal to a different dimension. Now, I just feel very uncomfortable around them for what I used to think was no reason. It turns out that the reason was that as a baby, a huge mirror fell on me and shattered. THAT EXPLAINS MY LUCK, I guess :p I can't imagine what went through my baby-mind as a reflection of me zoomed towards me and broke on probably my head. I don't remember any of it, but the trauma stuck with me in such a weird way.
Posted in Sleep schedule? Never heard of it Posted 5 years ago
@Lilykin: My "normal" schedule has been sleep from 8pm to anywhere between 1-3am, and wake up every hour 'till then. When I worked, I just had to struggle with that. Now, without the obligation of a job, I nap at 7am for one to two hours and again somewhere around noon to 2pm. If I'm super lucky I don't even have to nap, but what with being pregnant, its hard to avoid. Soon, I'll have a baby keeping me awake so I guess its a good thing I have practice :p
@Lucifera: The people land-mining and ghosting you are horrible jerks. Its not your fault. There is nothing wrong with being who you are and absolutely nobody has the right to make you feel that way. I know saying that there are better people out there who will take the time to treat you right doesn't really help your immediate situation, but its worth keeping in mind. The biggest help I had was having someone in my corner, someone who would listen and understand, someone who would encourage rather than point out what I was doing wrong. If you ever need more of that kind of person, I'm here for you. You're awesome, what you're doing is not easy, and the fact that you keep trying is incredible. Its perfectly understandable that your confidence is shaken, but hopefully that will just strengthen your resolve to keep at it. Our biggest struggles can be used to fuel us to greatness.
HEY. You're not alone. I was a hermit until I was about 27 years old. Social cues are hard. Figuring out how to be an independent adult is even harder. My go-to if people start looking at me weird when I say things is to laugh and say "Sorry, I don't understand social cues!" and usually it goes over well... However, this is after about 8 years of practice, and finally learning to be comfortable in my own skin. I was a horribly nervous and anxious child, told myself I was worthless and less-than just because I never left my house. I've definitely had my anxiety get the best of me, and have even just ran from work to home without telling anyone that I left. The best advice I can give, and the hardest advice to actually employ, is don't be hard on yourself about it. Its ok to make mistakes, thats how you learn. If other people want to judge you for that, F* 'em. Its not hard to be compassionate, and real friends will take the time to understand where you are coming from, and they'll help you get where you are going, too.
Posted in Sleep schedule? Never heard of it Posted 5 years ago
I'm narcoleptic, and this is the best sleep schedule I've ever had because I can just... go to bed when I start passing out during the day, or just get up when I can't sleep at night. I don't have to fight it, I don't have to worry that cataplexy will make me look like I'm on drugs... life is great now XD