Ark's Post-A-Lot - Voltra Online

Ark

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I checked my application status online and I’m still waitlisted, so maybe their email response won’t be as bad as I think?

… I’m still scared to open it, though.

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Working at the coffee shop for the past 2 weeks has proven to me that men are useless to me, and that I’m capable of doing literally any and everything by myself. I’ve always known this, but these past 2 weeks have solidified that.

Ark

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Also, time is going unbearably slow and I hate that I’m stuck with these new guys for the next 5 hours. I can already tell this day is going to be an annoyance.

Ark

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I finally read the email and admissions basically said they can't share any information with me right now, as they're still trying to figure things out themselves.

Ark

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Since I'm still unsure about school and don't really have a clear direction on what to do right now, what should I do?

I want to try my chances at applying for an apartment, but what if I won't be able to afford it? What if I get approved for an apartment and get accepted in to school, causing me to have to leave my dental job to focus on school? If that's the case then I fear I won't be able to afford an apartment with only one job. What if my new job doesn't have the hours I'm looking for, causing me to only be able to work 2-3 days week as opposed to 4 or 5? What if I get approved for an apartment thinking I'll make enough money to afford it, but then taxes take out a chunk of my paycheck and I won't be able to afford it?

Ugh, what do I doooooo?

Ark

Friend PM Trade

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I want to move out so bad, though. I'll never move out if I don't try.

While my questions and concerns are valid, I can't let them keep me from moving on with my life or else I'll be stuck in the same place I'm in now.

Ark

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I just get anxious at the thought of applying. What if I get rejected? Again, what if I can't afford it? I can barely afford to live in my cheap apartment right now, even with 2 jobs. I live paycheck-to-paycheck now, what if it'll be worse in a new apartment? Ugggh @~@

Ark

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As always, there are so many what-ifs that hold me back from doing anything in life. :/

Ark

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I don't like not having clarity. Uncertainty only intensifies my anxiety. I need clarification @~@

Ark

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Cause I found an apartment that I actually want to apply for, but it's $885/month. My place right now is $611/month. Should I take a chance and go for that huge increase?

I found another one I like that's about $715/month, but I don't like it as much as the $885/month apartment.

Ark

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I feel so confused about my life.

I genuinely don't know which direction to take...

Ark

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I feel so sad.

I feel like I’m back at square one with my life.

Ark

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My heavy ass neighbor is home, vibrating the fuck out of my ceiling.

Ark

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Why am I not good enough? Why do I try so hard, just to get nothing I worked hard for in the end?

Ark

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I really hope I’ll be accepted into school.

I really, really hope so…

Ark

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I’ve been so bored today that I’ve been studying. I studied Japanese for a little bit, and have been studying orthodontics for the past few hours.

Earlier I reviewed some dental hygiene Kahoots.

Now I’m gonna study oral pathology.

Ark

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I want to learn about the dental field.

School, please accept meeeeeeee.

Ark

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I feel like no matter what I do, I’m never gonna go far.

Ark

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Everyone around me is achieving great things and moving forward with their lives, meanwhile I feel stuck in the same place I’ve been in for 2 years.

Ark

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The amount of work and effort I’ve put into trying to change/ better my life, and to not get any results is so so so mentally taxing.

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