Amity's posts

What if I wrote to the government about that lmao

I wonder if that would stress him out more to have someone get involved lmao. Like if it actually turned into something.

Still I should take some time to read up ok it. And I need to get serious about my cdl!!! Ahhh

And I have art to finish for Voltra!!

I should try to educate myself on things he cares about. I don’t have time for it anyway but I do wish I knew enough about logging to help him with those trees across the creek. Those are really stressing him out. And he’s right in that that’s some classist anti working class ignorant bs on behalf of the legislators

I hope he can sell part of the place and use his part of the money to rest. I’m remembering him even 5-10 years ago before rhisINSANW ALIMONY!!!!! Insane!!!!!!!!!! His lawyer!!!!!!!!! What the f!!!!!!!

Anyway. Remembering him before that. Quiet and sweeter and kinda sad but interested I think. He had time for educating himself and dispelling his own ignorance on some things. Less so now I think. And I guess I’m the same way. And he doesn’t have a wife or even I think close friend to bounce ideas around with so he’s stagnating.

Ahh whatever. It’ll be fine. I’ll go to work as normal, and visit him more on the weekends when we’re both home. See how that goes.

I feel like my political views can be summed up as “vote Bernie. End racism” like at this point that’s all I have time for. And I don’t have the energy to have to explain to someone why I feel that way.

Our bigges issue I think is our experiences have been so different and our worldviews and politics are so different as a result. And he cares so much about politics. And I just don’t at this point. And I don’t have the energy for real conversations about that stuff.

I think we’re both ignorant on each other’s issues. It’s true I shouldn’t be so ignorant.

I think my lack of political commentary worries him more than my actual perspective or opinion. He wants to know what I think and why but I just don’t have much to offer in that area. Life is exhausting enough without it.

I do love him and I miss him. And I think he feels the same way about me. We both miss the old version of each other and are having trouble with the new current version. It’s rough.

There was a time where my dad would have done the bare minimum to keep her alive and relatively happy; he’d care because I care. He showed some of that again when we moved in and she was getting treed and chased for the first time and he was really worried about her.

Oh this swee cats making bread on me. It’ll really suck if we have to rehome her. But that’s better than leaving her up here where the dogs will chase her and no one will care for her.

Had a gender crisis at work today which is one of the reasons I chose to leave early. Baby walked me through it. She’s so good and I’m so lucky to have her.

Like, so what’s the truth? The duality of man nonsense? Honestly I’m gonna be 30 and I don’t truly know what that means or where it came from

And now we’re back to our regularly scheduled Tom foolery. The man said something about dogs or hotdogs and then yelled about hating people and weirdos.

I try to keep last night in mind. Idk. The other night now I guess. Still my last night but his other night now.

I feel stupid but I guess I don’t need to. I’m okay. My family is okay for tonight. No one hates me, after all. No one who matters anyway.

Oh I guess I feel shame. Shame at being week and struggling to quit. But I want to. God I want to. I need to. I have to. Ahhhhh. God god god.