Xanthan's posts

@Another Movie Addict: that is awesome. Congrats!

@Seionshi: For me it was various critters coming up out of the toilet. Snakes. Spiders. Critters. I'm from the South and normally critters don't bother me, but when you're in a prone position....yeah.

And I totally understand where you're coming from with the mad madam mim. She was quite the animated witch but that's still one of my fave Disney movies.

@Totalanimefan Alice was trippy for me when I was younger. But I've always enjoyed trippy. Lol

@Colan: I never thought I'd have kids. Always wanted a whole slew of em though.

@Colan: well.....a blessing and a curse? Lol he is so mich like me that I really have nothing to say. He saved my life though. He has been my proudest accomplishment by far.

Catches the ravioli. Sits it neatly to the side. Digs around in my hoodie. ::pulls out a loaf of bread and tossed it to the next poster::

Daffodil

Yerba Mate

@Colan: i assure you, I've made hella mistakes but rarely have I repeated them. Life is about living, not merely surviving. And life is meant to be spent lifting one another up and not tearing down or apart. Sadly, life is not meant for us to live solely for ourselves but to learn to live with ourselves and everyone else.

You doing ok? I'm cooking my son breakfast and am free if ya wanna chat. You pick any topic. :)

I think about my past in general, quite often. But at my age I learned that the past is a great place to visit not live. I allow myself time to remember and reminisce. I make sure to keep the good memories alive and well, yet not forget the less than pleasant ones. Those are where lessons lie.

Tonight someone is on my mind. They occupy a lot of space in my head. But I cannot become consumed. I've taken time to write out my thoughts both in a journal and via poetry. I've made it a point to discuss it in a healthy way so that instead of venting I am processing and praying because I need strength not sympathy.

Essentially, I try not to have regrets or what might have beens. My pain, my trauma, my choices, they were all learning experiences and sadly I've learned more from my mistakes than my successes. It was the one's who told me I would never be enough, never find someone as good as, told me to pick rocks, and even at times kill over that really sank in the message of what I will and will not put up with.

Keep the memories alive my friend. Neither consume yourself with them nor ignore them. Process through them. Try and stay objective. And look for the lessons. If ever you wanna talk feel free to hit me up.

@chika: thank you so very much. It does make sense. Sadly irl I cannot dress myself so here i get to play around. You're a real sweetheart!

I don't generally have fear. Mostly anxiety LOL

But I guess I'd say I fear helplessness as in, not being there for my son when he needs me.

Not teaching him or raising him to be better than i have been.

Not being there for a friend in need (many times I've needed a friend or support and my corner has been empty so knowing that pain fuels my desire to help keep others from it)

I would say losing my mind. Battling with mental illness is tough on its own but losing one's faculties is a major fear.

Dementia/Alzheimer's

All in all, I try my best to just help others and I feel as though fear is simply a well fertilized plot for you to grow something stronger and more beautiful.

@chika: thank you! I have been toying with the looks here.
@Totalanimefan: i was going through a forum or museum or something, but I saw cute librarian outfits etc.....how would I go about getting something that is from past surges or whatnot?

@PurpdaBurpPurp: brainstorming for me tends to come easily. My problem right now is I have various "scenes" written but no full chapter. In fact I have about Idk 2/3 of 3 separate chapters and still deciding on my direction lol I cant make up my mind. PS love your artistic styling. I'm envious.

@chika: Hi, Hello, and Welcome! I'm pretty new here too but I am certain you'll like it. I've not heard of Sapherna but glad you're here. Everyone on this site is friendly and welcoming. Enjoy your stay :)